The More Things Change, the More You Look Fat

I’ve always come out publicly against the golden-tinged, misty-eyed, nostalgiac viewpoint that things used to be better back before… Things have always sucked. Take this passage from Howard Zinn’s A People’s History of the United States

A writer in early 1930, boosting the beauty business, started off a magazine article with the sentence: “The average American woman has sixteen square feet of skin.” He went on to say that there were forty thousand beauty shops in the country , and that $2 billion was spent each year on cosmetics for women—but this was insufficient: “American women are not yet spending even one-fifth of the amount necessary to improve their appearance.” He then gave an itemized list of the “annual beauty needs of every woman”: twelve hot-oil treatments, fifty-two facials, twenty-six eyebrow plucks, etc. (Zinn, pgs. 503-4)

Awful! The real tragedy, of course, is how little progress we’ve made. Women, get your shit together already, you’re (still) fucking disgusting. Just because your mom burned her bra in college doesn’t mean you wouldn’t look better with a little goddamn makeup, Sleater Ugly.

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